I remember Mike Melling. Little bloke who always seemed to be there to witness me and my mates duffing it off the first into the sheds on the right. One of the lads once drilled one into the ground such that it went straight up in the air and was so imparted with back spin that it ended up on the competition tees. Mike not impressed as we collapsed in laughter. I now occasionally have a hack around Watertown Park with some family members but still have a cricket bat grip and try to smash everything through the offside.
Mike Melling - what a thoroughly miserable bloke (unless it was a put on persona) was the thing I remembered about him... made Victor Meldrew seem like the life and soul of the party
Ah! the 1st tee. 8 am Saturday mornings I used to sh*t myself. 19 years old 9 stone and 6ft 1 inch wet thru clubs in a bag and no trolley and no fancy gear. Watched by the low handicappers with their fancy full club sets in trolleys. I could not wait to get clear of the tee as when someone else before me either sliced the ball into the field or shanked it 15 yards you could hear the groans and moans from the waiting gallery. I usually resorted to the 'coward's way' and used a five iron to play down into the dip and then hit 'blind' up to the green/apron rather than try and make the plateau /green in one. just to get clear of them. The only time I ever 'went for it' was when a group of 'Tigers' asked me to join them as was playing alone and they were one short for a four ball (having seen my warm up swings which were actually were "text book stuff "(according to the pro at least ) but never seemed to connect properly when hitting the ball in anger when watched by others so they did not know I was actually cr^p) I. All three promptly put the balls on the 1st green and I was too embarrassed to play my usual shot, took a 4 wood out of my bag, took a deep breath and swung. Amazingly, I hit a screamer and the ball ended up about 4 foot from the pin and got a chorus of 'great shot' . I actually got down in 3 -the only time I ever did the first hole to Par let alone a birdie. For some reason up to around halfway I was having a blinder and sunk a couple of 30 footers and was almost playing to par ......that is until I got to a hole on the back 9 (cant remember the number) but the area in front of the tee was about 50 metres of scrub. Now I was always as unerringly drawn to scrub/water when playing golf as a middle aged man is drawn to a woman's ample bosom and I hit (topped!) 3 balls around 15 yards into the scrub and could find only 1. It took me around 10 shots to play the hole (2 lost and one dropped ball) and my game fell apart. Got to the point where on 1 hole I really wanted to pick the ball up so as not to hold the guys up who, whilst initially were full of encouragement towards me and very chatty, were now starting to ignore me. Nevertheless I STILL broke 100 for the first (and only) time and unofficially managed a net 74.
4 hours is pretty standard for a fourball at most clubs these days. On the Mike Melling front, i’m sure most people would be pretty miserable sat in that hut from dawn until dusk watching Barnsley’s finest teeing it up. I used to play with him quite a bit for a few holes in the evening after school. Nice bloke and not surprisingly quite a decent golfer.
Richard Bland is currently 2 ahead at the US Open! Long long way to go but what a story if he could win it
Hope he can get a few more birdies and then the wind can blow a gale. Mind you I've had a few quid on big Jon to win it.
