Toilet roll update

Just for @BarnsleyReds I've just been for a number two and I reckon I've got about 3 more sh1ts left on my second roll. So that's almost 2 two rolls in 53 days (yeah I did the maths).

That's less than 7 rolls a year and I have genuinely no idea how

 

I have been wondering if anyone has run out over the last 2 months.

 

See a doctor

 

The odd thing is I'm sure I go often enough and I use enough toilet roll when I go but it just doesn't seem to ever go down. I reckon someone's topping it up when I'm not looking

 

That's some achievement to be fair!

 

I want to know how many people are stuck with piles of it in the house still

 

On a related note how much kitchen roll do people go though on general?

 

Guess thars got quite a few skiddies, cos we go through 7 bog rolls a fortnight, and there velvet. Stay safe smelly ar se.

 

Fcking loads. Every time the wife spills anything or wipes down the sides she uses about 6 slices of the stuff.

 

Take it your a folder not a scruncher then

 

Slices? You might want to have a word with her if your bread is going down really quickly. When was the last time she had her eyes tested?

 

Bloody hell. We’ve had to get another 16 pack since I last mentioned buying one

 

Before she married me I presume.

 

We’ve gone through a roll and a half of kitchen roll and maybe 8 loo rolls? I’m not fully sure as I can’t remember how many were left in the cupboard before I filled it back up (it holds 16).

 

Another Izal side effect.

 

Btw, 2 rolls every 50 odd days isn’t 7 a year...

 

Oops I forgot to times it by two

 

Are you often cleaning your fingernails?

 

Absolutely loads, even under normal circumstances. Quite a bit more if either a) we're locked down and have to cook and eat every meal at home, or b) we've run out of bog roll.

 

Kitchen roll does make decent bog roll. You tend to use fewer sheets but it is more difficult to flush down. You end up pushing it down with your hands if there's blockage.
On another note, when the panic was on to find bog roll I was in Buildbase and bought one of those huge rolls of blue tissue, about a million sheets worth of paper. Three quid. Still got it. Will probably never use it. Cannot therefore vouch for its softness, strength or wipeability, or if it leaves after-rash. It may be made of the sweepings off the floor.
Any offers?