Especially as even if she was asked where she was from, I’m certain she wouldn’t be asked where her parents are from!
You can ask a person where they are from and their answer should steer the convo. 'Where are you from? Hackney Bit of a shithole isn't it. This is acceptable, going on to push and ask 'but where are you really from' is not acceptable. If the person answers 'Hackney, but family from Africa' - then you can of course ask where in Africa
From the transcript, I think you had an elderly lady a bit out of touch and somebody being deliberately obtuse to provoke the reaction she got. When asked where she came from , why couldn’t say she was British but her family were originally from……, she obviously knew what the questioner was getting at.
If they had a none standard English name yes i may ask where the name originated and if that reflected their ethnicity. Only the other week I was in the company of a person of Indian sub continent heritage who had an extremely long name which I correctly identified as Sri Lankan and we had a conversation about their heritage despite the fact they spoke with a thick Yorkshire accent they were quite happy to discuss their family origins. I'm no royalist but the lady in question is 83 and let's face it she was only asking the same questions alot of 83 year olds would ask and in the same way the fact she as been removed from her duties should be enough. But sadly it probably won't be.
Bully for you! I can only assume you are either quite young, don't socialise and/or meet new people much particularly from diverse ethnic origins . Like your post #15 I am not entirely sure what points you are trying to make other than appearing to imply anyone who does not agree with you is in part racist. I, like at least one or two others on this thread, are regularly asked where I come from. I suppose it depends where you live. As an English person in Italy people are naturally curious. It is often followed up by 'Why did you come here?" That is, again either provocative or innocent. I could take offence but I have never found it so. People like to know why we chose Italy over any other place (including the UK) to live.
I've asked 2 people where they are from in the last week, but that was based on their Irish accents, so I could tell they weren't from the mainland of the UK - If the person has a foreign accent its fine to ask where they are from. If they have a recognisable English/Scottish/Welsh accent its fine to ask them whereabouts in the UK they are from, otherwise asking someone of a different colour with a British type accent where they are from 'originally' - you have to be careful otherwise it just sounds racists.
In my line of work I come across a lot of non British whites, Albanian, Lithuanian, Bulgarian, Polish & Romanian to name a few. I will often ask where they are from as I don’t have a clue from their accent. This is often followed by questions from me about where they are from. That’s not me being racist but at best being interested at worst being nosy!!
Ok Tekky you start your post with a link to a report of blatant insensitivity by a old Royal hanger on then seek affirmation from the BBS for a similar incident you had with your daughters friend that clearly made your daughter uncomfortable and appear totally oblivious to any upset you caused , which is usually the way with your type !!! I’m more interested in what someone’s got to say than where they are from
I get asked where I’m from all the time. If I say ‘Richmond’ they’ll say “no, where do you really come from?” I say “Barnsley in Yorkshire.” They often come straight back with the classic ‘Baaaaaaaarnsley,” the clear inference being that I’m as thick as anyone else who comes from Barnsley or the north in general. I then ask whether they’ve got some speech impediment or learning difficulty. Another question that’s asked is “Why do you northerners come down here?” If asked in an innocent friendly way I’ll say “ We came down here looking for an inside toilet.” If it’s more aggressive… “You closed our pits so we’re here to take your jobs and **** your women”
"With your type",!! Really? And what is in your opinion 'my type' given that we have never met? There is always one who has to post provocatively on an otherwise benign thread.
“Bully for you! I can only assume you are either quite young, don't socialise and/or meet new people much particularly from diverse ethnic origins “ You were saying
What the woman did was not right whatsoever. However, she’s a product of her surroundings . A surrounding of which most of us will never experience. Like most 80 year old people i have met and worked for , still act the way she has. They are from a different world to the one we live in. A World that as discrimination more than just ethnicity in it. Now, if it would have been someone in their 50’s or 60’s i would be more concerned .
Everyone’s examples of being asked where they are from involves them themselves having moved somewhere, which is evident by their accent. The difference with this story though is that she is from Britain, and had a British accent, but she still kept being quizzed based on her parents. It’s like if you moved down south, had a child who spoke with a London accent and people kept asking them where they are really from. They are really from London, it would never occur to them to say they are from Barnsley because they’re not and they’ve never been there in their life. This would be even more the case if it was your grandchild or great grandchild, how long does your coming from Barnsley have to affect your offspring being classed as an outsider to London? If the person kept pushing it and pushing it, making them feel like they don’t belong as they won’t accept them as a Londoner it would be upsetting/annoying. When it is based purely on skin colour it is also racist.