On a personal level

Discussion in 'Bulletin Board' started by nezbfc, Feb 1, 2020.

  1. nezbfc

    nezbfc Well-Known Member

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    Last year was pretty **** considering.

    I wont go into detail but let's just say, it's been a pretty bad couple of years.

    I'm embarking on a new challenge and I'm just about me again...

    I refuse to let the **** at my club be the only thing holding me back.

    The king is dead, long live the king (I think)

    Anyway, long live me :)
     
  2. RedStriker

    RedStriker Well-Known Member

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    Eh?
     
  3. nezbfc

    nezbfc Well-Known Member

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    I'm saying, I've had more than your average person to deal with the last couple of years. Many would have completely folded. I wasnt far off.

    But I'm a fighter, and believe it or not, results on a Saturday make a big difference. And I'm not allowing the downside of BFC to be the one thing that stops me reaching my happy and heady hights again.

    If that makes more sense.....?
     
  4. RedStriker

    RedStriker Well-Known Member

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    How exactly does it make a big difference?
     
  5. nezbfc

    nezbfc Well-Known Member

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    I wasnt looking for attention, but will put the **** ive faced on here if it makes you feel better.

    2 years ago, my close relative who we more or less treat each others as brothers died. In Spain. We thought it was suicide and he had issues. Turns out it wasnt but balls to that, he still died. It ****** me right up.

    So much so, that last year, because I never got over it (and still cant) it cost me my marriage. 19 years wed been together, 2 kids.

    I now live alone with my 2 kids. And I'm doing pretty well considering.

    So Saturdays, when we play well, offer some light relief to the **** I've faced. I am able to forget. It's harder when we are ****, because it does matter. And then on sundays the 2 kids results matter too.

    All 3 win I'm in heaven. All 3 lose, I get a bit down.

    The famous saying of that manager however it was. it's more than life or death or whatever.

    I've had an horrendous ***** ordeal.

    But....

    I'm just about there and just about happy in myself.

    Many in my position (and I've seen it) have completely folded and took their own lives (yes I have seen the same in me that someone else couldn't take just a few months ago)

    I sought help,and have been on anti depressants for the last 5 months.

    So when I say football gives release and pleasure, it does.

    Understandable?
     
  6. RedStriker

    RedStriker Well-Known Member

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    I sympathise with your plight, indeed been some way down that road too but football is a business, it may generate strong primordial emotions but it’s still a business and one that you or I , short of voting with your feet, have no sway over.
    Personally, it’s not worth the grief getting wound up over what a football club does or does not do.
    There’s more to it than that.
     
  7. MarioKempes

    MarioKempes Well-Known Member

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    Its good to hear from you Tolstoy and good to hear you're in better spirits.

    Good luck with the new challenge mate. Oh and talking of spirits we really must have a pre match drink some time soon.
     
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  8. Jimmy viz

    Jimmy viz Well-Known Member

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    football was a sport the last time I looked. And wind your neck in the blokes had a **** time and going to the match (sometimes) offers some relief and joy. That’s exactly what football and supporting your team is all about. If you want to support a business rock up in Tescos car park every other Saturday
     
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  9. Jimmy viz

    Jimmy viz Well-Known Member

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    keep on keeping on.
     
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  10. DEETEE

    DEETEE Well-Known Member

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    Put your phone down. Get your dancing shoes on. Go chase some young ladies for fingers & tops.
     
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  11. Tarntyke

    Tarntyke Well-Known Member

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    Well done for carrying on through your adversity, as someone has already posted keep on keeping on. Following a football club is a roller coaster of emotions, but if we can keep doing a stop-check along the way and put things into perspective it should help. I stopped listening to live radio commentary as it was too annoying and stressful. I find that watching on TV or even better, if possible, being at the game. I can make my own judgements and I accept/ get over poor results much easier.
     
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  12. nezbfc

    nezbfc Well-Known Member

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    Yes pal that would be good. One thing I've realised recently is all the stuff I can now do with having just me and the kids.

    Total boys house now lol.

    But definitely we should meet up for a tipple or 10 :)
     
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  13. nezbfc

    nezbfc Well-Known Member

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    All in good time. I think it will do me some good to learn to be good in my own company. And I'm getting there
     
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  14. TitusMagee

    TitusMagee Well-Known Member

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    Wish I'd had done that immediately after splitting mate. All the best with everything.
     
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  15. nezbfc

    nezbfc Well-Known Member

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    A good mate of mine advised it, and it hit home tbh. And thanks
     
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  16. Bri

    Brian Mahoneys Waist Well-Known Member

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    Keep your chin up nezbfc.I hope you're bringing your boys up in the Reds way.
     
  17. nezbfc

    nezbfc Well-Known Member

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    That goes without saying lol
     
  18. MarioKempes

    MarioKempes Well-Known Member

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    Stay positive pal. By the way Geoff retires in a couple of months and there might be a bit of a do for him if we can get it organised. I'll let you know; you'd be very welcome.
     
  19. Wor

    Worksop red Active Member

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    I totally understand what your saying, when in depression it's the little things that keep you keep you going, stuff that might sound unimportant and trivial to other people.
    Last year I was going through a rough bout of depression and to cut a long story short I tried to commit suicide I had it all planned out I even rang the police to tell them where my body would be thankfully my plan failed (I was really drunk and rushing myself). I ended up getting arrested and being held under the mental health act, and all I wanted to do was to get out and finish the job off. Whilst I was in the hospital I was with the police and I made a pact with myself that if barnsley had won that day I would do my best to get out of this depression but if we had lost I would get out and finish the job (bare in mind this was end of November we hadn't won since the first game of the season) looking back I was very stupid to put my life on the result of a game of football but I obviously wasn't in a good mental state of mind. Fortunately we played Hull that day and we won so here I am. I'm recovering at the moment taking all the help I can get and not letting it stew inside me and hopefully I will never be in that state of mind again. But I can relate to th op that sometimes when your having a bad day a good result from your team can just give you that little boost that you need but on the flip side it shouldn't be allowed to ruin your day when the result goes against its making that conscious decision between the both
     
  20. nezbfc

    nezbfc Well-Known Member

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    Yes keep me posted and I'll do all I can to meet up
     
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